Church Jester Pillows

"Being the rookie on the offering team. Bill was assigned to count the coins."

"We're following Carrot Top."

Pappa clown views offspring in maternity window.

'How about a game of cards?'

'Pass it to Dewey! He's got himself into some kind of rhythm!!'

At the 2021 Religious Games

"It's great to see Biff; Socksie the cat is out of the bag..."

'Wait!... I don't want to take Brady out right now. He's just getting into rhythm.'

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

Stepping on clown's shoe...

Drunk Barber

"I say we move on to dessert."

'Make him laugh, make him cry.'

"If I survive this holiday, I'm moving to a pond."

"Perhaps it wasn't so wise to bring Frosty along!"

Basketball.

'Court is in recess for one hour. Everyone convene on the playground and we will choose sides for dodgeball!'

"At first, I was teaching Job a lesson, but now I'm just messing with him."

'That will be 100 hours of community service in some other community.'

Jesus plays peek-a-boo with doubting Thomas.

'Radford, go in for Bloom. ... Uh-uh-uh! Finish your vegetables first!'

'Keep it under you hat, but I want you to enrich some uranium.'

'The score is tied and we've only got a 20-second timeout, so we've gotta be quick. ... I'm 'X'. Who wants to be 'O'?'

"I'm popping out for a tinkle."

'Well, the magic of Christmas is officially over, unless it includes waking up to a septic tank backup.'

'What are the chances? I mean, all 10 players simultaneously dive for a loose ball and conk heads?'

'He's got a good attitude, and he's tall. But he's got to get into the weight room.'

"Behind the back, between the legs, around my disappointed parents, nothing but net."

'I'm looking for someone who can make me laugh.'

"She's about to get him on the rebound."

'I said, I've decided to make myself available for the NBA draft.'

Travelling jesters. No fools left aboard overnight.

'And now for my William Tell shot.'

'Make sport of the Queen.'