Chronicler Of Woes Pillows

'Misery only loves company if the company does't know any specifics.'

''My Summer Vacation †the Untold Story'....'

'Never trust emails. You can't shred them.'

Cheer up-things aren't so bad.....

'Ten things you should be worried about.'

Greek Tragedy: 'Yes... we agree to further cuts in government spendings..!!!'

'More pictures of your kids. Wow, they've really grown since yesterday.'

'Boy! The cost of health care is going up, up, up...'

"She's always writing in that journal of hers. Maybe she'll be a notary public when she grows up."

Anthony Trollope

"I don't know. I just don't think this 'bowling' thing will work."

Frontispiece to the second volume of 'Master Humphrey's Clock'

"Chapter One: Call me Scooter..."

'Oh no! Here comes our insurance guy! He's 3 minutes early for our appointment.'

'I think your doctor gave you the wrong note, Sir. We don't have any bread and milk.'

'Those who can do; those who can't, chronicle.'

'She always has her own way. She even writes her diary a few days in advance.'

Divorcees Club - The Joy of Ex.

"Did I ever tell you what happened to a friend of mine once?"

I keep meaning to write my memoirs, but I never get around to it. It's your "oughta" biography!

'If you don't stop worrying...you're going to die.'

"I don't feel so good, Tia Carmen."

The reassurer: the magazine for chronic worriers

'Oops, I've only got fifteen hundred shots left and we still have two full days before we go home.'

'It's my suicide note. Chapter 147.'

I resent the fact that the only item listed on the menu is soup with a fly in it. I resent the fact that the script calls for me to give you a big smile. It's tough all over. Menu.

Man films uses phone camera. Woman says: 'I fail to see how filming the cat makes you a citizen journalist.'

Jean de Joinville

Sorry WE'RE CLOSED.

Corona Virus Trump

"It' the dog."

"Here's to a clean start ..."

Paranoids' Anonymous

Before it was called the 'Dark Ages'.

"My mother gets a note from the teacher every day. I'll be glad when her subscription expires."