Christmas Party Goers Gifts

'I love you guys!'

'Have you tried our home-made wine?'

Sloaney Pony.

"Let's start with an icebreaker..."

"That's it lads, 364 days annual leave...what would we have done without our union!"

Piranhaclaus

'I swear, if he didn't always pick up the tab, I'd never go drinking with him.'

"The eggnog fountain is a bad idea."

"I think it stopped breathing."

Thesaurus Company

'Is this a party, a cheese and wine do, a cocktail party, a soiree or just another of your old cronies get-togethers?'

"I've got a strict work/life policy at work... Anyone who has a life doesn't work anymore!"

"Gesundheit!"

"Put out the Asian sates, the Russian blinis, and the Mexican bean dips, while whip up something Korean."

Blue Haired Lady in Ballgown

'Kids like my presents, but do they really like me?'

How to read the dress code?

"Hi, my name is Rudolph." "Hi Rudolph." "And I have a drinking problem." "Hi Rudolph." "Hi Rudolph." "Hi Rudolph." "Hi Rudolph." "Hi Rudolph."

'Thanks for having us and I'm really sorry about the cheeseball. Honestly, I didn't realise I was meant to share it.'

"I was at a party with SO many famous people, I was the only one there I'd never heard of..!"

"I'm terrible with names, but never fail at fingerprint, facial or voice recognition."

"My compliments to the sommelier."

"Don't be silly - we're being perfectly fine hosts."

"Have you given any thought to legacy and sustainability?"

'Before you go, introduce yourself, so that I know who you were...'

'We need to dance around this issue. Get me someone from the choreography department.'

"Oh, Lord! Not another wine-and-cheese party!"

"Of course it's not easy to read the body language of someone who's basically inert."

Christmas Canapes

"Edward, you are already more than Christmassy enough."

Budget Munchies

All day I design high tech communication devices...yet at a party I'm lost without name tags.

"You fit in. You just don't match."

"Same old crowd."

"That's Bridgeport from legal, he's got the consent forms."