Christmas Festivities Gifts

"Next year Jimmy gets a sweater for Christmas."

'The ward 'Christmas Festivities' have had to be cut...but management say patients can still use the office to photocopy your bottoms.'

'This child obesity is killing me!'

Ice Skater

'I'd forgotten , tonight is our office Christmas party isn't it...!!'

"Can you throw in a few school closings due to snow with my new sled?"

Ice skater

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

"Living in a city with functional infrastructure must be so boring."

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

"We found the poor thing stranded on the beach last summer and decided to adopt it."

'The wheel was great, but what have you done for me lately?'

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

"Do you want to play doctorate?"

Bitchbark Canoe

It is important to give your dog opportunities to play with people.

"Chocolate? I can't be allergic to chocolate! I'm a kid, can't you say I'm allergic to spinach or broccoli?"

Young Frank Lloyd Wright

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

'Hurry, wipe it off before Dad comes home!'

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

Tartine

"Young Frankenstein"

At the end of each day, Gary had approximately 7 minutes of free time – which left him feeling very vulnerable.

"Tight......this isn't tight...now a New York City apartment......that's tight."

Lady taking her little dog to the chemist with a cough

Robot Parts $5

'Isn't that cute! They're thanking us.'

"How can you be out of wings?"

"Bark or stare? Always a tough decision. Bark? Maybe stare? Whimper? Maybe? Meanwhile, stare."

"Being raised in the city, Fred didn’t quite grasp the true purpose of a game camera."

City Zoo: Day Care

The Games Man: Fishing is his sole form of exercise - but he considers it bad form to move more than his wrist when casting.

Joey discovers the difference between coffee beans and jelly beans.

Come dine with me!