Christmas Enthusiasts Pillows

'As you can see, I've been targeted by advertisers.'

'On the outside I'm all ho-ho-ho. But inside I feel weak and shaky, like a bowl full of jelly.'

Santa running down the street after tow truck towing away sleigh and reindeer

Reindeer looking on with fear as Santa counts down and elf if about to launch sleigh with a giant slingshot.

'Well, that's us FINALLY paid off all the bills from Christmas last year.'

Santa's Snowmen Bodyguards

Christmas gift exchange - bah humbug

'Naughty or nice? Isn't that a violation of privacy disclosure rules?'

Shepherds visit baby Jesus. Joseph says: 'Oh, there's plenty of room at the inn, we're just downsizing.'

'I need tickets to...everywhere.'

North Pole Coal Company - Supplying naughty children the world over.

Santa's office with 'In' and 'You'd better watch Out' Trays.

Ever vigilant, the restive Claus uses it to get an early start on the naughty and nice list.

'OKay, we're going in - remember where we parked!'

'Are we going to run out of decorations?'

'Whoa! I guess we shouldn't have eaten those bean burritos before leaving the workshop!'

Geez... I didn't even know Santa had a hit list!'

The elf union is picketing Santa's House - 'Christmas just isn't the same since the union stepped in!'

Santa's Helpers: Keystone XL Pipeline feeds Middle Class Tax Cuts.

"Rudolph, call the recruitment department - I asked for 'Elvish helpers!'"

'The night before Christmas and there goes my last chance of getting research funding.'

Christmas Cat

"My dad wants me to have all the things he never had, and he never had a pony."

"I'll meet you back at the sleigh. I've just got to go powder my nose."

'It's getting harder to have a niche business.'

'If you give me your email address, I'll put you on my mailing list.'

"I'm the ghost of no-Christmas-for-you!"

"My toy factory...it's completely imaginary."

"Christmas day or nor, it was under the tree! How could you expect me not to peek?"

'Santa sees you when you're sleeping, he knows when you're awake, he knows if you've been good, and he can find everyone's house with his GPS.'

Twelfth Day of Christmas

Skinny Santa Claus munches on carrot, as obese Rudolph eats mince pie.

"Take it easy on the spray lube. It's pretty slick stuff!"

'Santa has been and he's taken our telly...'

"Boy, this is gonna be a long night!"