Christianity Connoisseur Pillows

"Frankincense you fool...."

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

"Who's taking my order—the committee of the whole, or is there a liaison for decaf?"

Archimedes statue with a lever

'Are you sure this is authentic ancient Indian art?'

"Can you speak up: there's a bloody racket going on in the background."

"I only like their bad albums – the good ones are too commercial."

Mendelssohn Finds His Inspiration

Turning Japanese: I really think so.

"We evolved from asteroids"

"Please hold applause until end of dragon."

'Not even close man - easy listening's around the corner.'

"The Leonardos, the Raphaels, Titians, Veroneses, Giottos... Italy wants them back, all 427 of them."

Creation of Red Wine

Mea Maxima Cuppa

'Coffee must wear you out. They're always sleepy when they drink it.'

Atlas with the earth, says: 'So then I thought, Why not just roll the damn thing?'

Guide reading book called 'A farewell to arms.'

"You're never home."

Scarpia's Palace

"You sure you guys don't spike the coffee?"

The Cremaster Cycle

"How the hell is that supposed to feed us?"

"By 'genius' do they mean the artist or the marketing department?"

"Hey, would you mind taking a quick sculpture of me and my family?"

'The Easter Bunny has started outsourcing to us.'

'Sorry mate. Your church doesn't meet the minimum building code.'

"A pint for me and one for the woad!"

Music Student

Sir Edward Elgar

The Kali De Milo.