Chore List Humorist Pillows

Jack Frost's To Dew List: Trees, grass, leaves, windows, cars.

Owing to a clerical error, Luciano Pavarotti receives kudus instead of kudos for his performance as the Duke of Mantua.

"Right now Arnold Schwarzenegger is doing sit-ups."

"We're gonna entertain you for exactly the next 30 minutes."

Carrot in front of the donkey workout.

"I feel like tearing of all your clothes and putting them in the washing machine."

"I was ironing the curtains and fell out of the window..!"

'Looks like Shelia has overdone it with the cream scones this week!'

Hello-BUNS OF STEEL?

'Where my balls go?'

Magic Act

Mouse real estate!

St Peter: 'The bike can stay. You, on the other hand, aren't on the list.'

"My doctor told me I should start working out."

'Fred, didn't I tell you to wear a helmet?'

Why graphs are confusing

"It was a slow day - my pedometer says I only put in 1,273,426 steps."

Cohesion Of Cohort/Shared Behaviors

'I will now play a selection of digital audio files I downloaded today.'

"You know I always sit there for my keep fit programme!"

"It's trouble for Chubby when Mitzi brings out the vacuum."

'Let's shop faster. I need the exercise.'

I add 1,000 steps every day just going back to my car to get the mask I was supposed to put on."

Crash Test Dummy's Running Machine

"You could do with some weight training."

"I'm sorry I used three squirts of washing up liquid instead of two."

Now you can buy shares online. "Buy Cher's What?"

Mahout and his elephant on wash day.

"I'm inspired to try to run a marathon."

'Don't say anything!'

'...Then I swept down the staircase, into the ballroom.'

The Theatre of Mime.

Sidewinder Sam's Aerobic Studio

Elephant chases peanut on stick while running on treadmill.

"Maybe it's about time you brought an arm, chest, shoulder, back and lower leg master?"