Chopstick User Gifts

Year of the Rat

Cat croissant, cat baguette, cat muffin, cat turnover

Dog fetching clown shoes.

"I don't know whether to be mad that you had water this whole time or impressed with your commitment to the joke."

'Now this is exactly what I was referring to when I talked about 'scope creep'.'

"You and your daft inventions."

Haute Chinese

"Would you like to try them out?"

Dramedy: "I'm leaving you."

GARDU VIN! (BEWARE!). Clown sees several pies to beware of.

Moebot

"Remember son, evolution peaks with us - chimps were in space before man!"

Not that one. It's got the chips in it.

'Gone out, Your dinners in your face'

'We'll return to the evening news right after this message from the Three Stooges....'

Magician makes a smell

'That's not funny, Fred.'

'Custard pie or not. It's still considered assault!'

The sudden extinction of Neanderclowns

Laurel and Hardy

"Heh, Trump likes his steaks well done with ketchup. Jesus."

Frederic Chopin.

'All the rice you can eat... with one chopstick.'

Crazy paving company.

"I didn't mean to trample him. How do you say 'my bad' in human?"

"Isn't Jim Carrey getting too old to make Jim Carrey movies?"

'I couldn't figure out how to get rid of those stupid subtitles, so I slapped some duct tape over them.'

A clown is being executed by having cream pies thrown at him.

'It's been a few hundred years, gentlemen... I think it's finally time to admit that forks are better.'

The Banana Crime

Clown escaping a shipwreck on an inflatable unicycle.

"They won't work!!!"

"And if anything goes wrong I'd like to donate my body to comedy."

I find that I can cut back on calories if I use only one chopstick.

"It was a lovely holiday. The chips crispy and delicious, the ice cream cornets were to die for, the only downside being, the hostility of the humans, who were reluctant to share their sustenance."