Chop Chop Champ T-Shirts

Sign on the door at Karate School.

"Here's another one written in E minor and in case you haven't guessed by now, it's the only chord I know."

'Dr Hodges, here, is from England and he's been observing us for 14 years. Mr Ferrell, an American, has been here only 3 weeks. Monique Corveu, from Paris, has practically been living with us for about nine years...'

'She hasn't advanced to figure eights yet.'

CAUTION: Creative genius at work

Haute Chinese

Monkey casino study.

"Deal! I'll introduce you to Dian Fossey and you'll introduce me to Jane Goodall!"

Fortunately, his training had prepared him to deal with all types of customers.

My music gave me a grade of F sharp.

'Honey, can you believe we share 99% of our DNA with chimps!?'

'I thought she'd never leave.'

"What setting do I use for this?"

'If it weren't for baseball, this whole thing could have ended much differently.'

"Love them rays, Chief."

'Look out for the park ranger while Bernie and I chop us some firewood!'

"Careful...she bites."

'That's it Ma'am: Your VCR is set and programmed... You don't need to be an Alpha Male to work it out...'

"Hide all the chopsticks."

"Waiter, these chopsticks are not cooperating."

"'Wash the Car'? Isn't that nepotism?"

Chinese noodles.

'Hey, I just noticed something. So you know what you get if you cover the 'c' in potato chips? Potato hips, isn't that funny?'

Little known evolutionary steps.

'Cooking, it's rocket science...'

'I'm not very hungry - just bring me some chopsticks.'

"I think I OD'd On chocolate chip ice cream!"

'One more fish, Alice, and you'll be able to use the old frying pan.'

'On second thought Mr. Akimoto, perhaps we can give you a loan to open a karate club.'

"Wow, human DNA is so close to ours! Pity they're just missing perfection by a few percentage points..."

"Sounds like my daughter's back from her karate lesson."

'...There's something about rescued dogs - they're just eager to please.'

"Family game night rocks! Especially when the winner decides what his prize is!"

yes it takes a little while to learn to handle chopsticks

"My wife has a black belt in cooking, she can kill a man with a single chop."