Chintz Enthusiast Gifts

"Now, in here, with our buff walls and aubergine chintz, our statement has dropped to a purr."

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

"Just be yourself."

'I should not that the cherry and whipped cream were an afterthought created by our graphics dept.'

'Quick! We need a bigger chart in here!'

"The trend in tough economic times is to put off everything that doesn't require immediate action ? as this chart shows."

'Now, keep in mind that these numbers are only as accurate as the fictitious data, ludicrous assumptions and wishful thinking they're based upon!'

"We need to change, but WHEN?"

'Why can't you tell me you love me without all the charts and graphs?!'

"Here are the new sales figures, which way up would you like them?"

Theatre Crowd

'We're holding our own, but I'd really like to see some growth.'

"Until we get a bigger chart, we're estimating it's now about up to here."

'Maybe the reason we don't have those 'off the chart' sales anymore is because our charts are too big.'

'If I may say so, business is booming.'

Business is off the chart.

'Sorry, everyone. That last chart kind of startled me.'

"I believe I can create a great presentation if I can only tap into my cognitive dissonance."

Soaring Profits

Expenses/Income. "Our only problem is working out how to switch these."

'We're all right as long as they think we're taking millions.'

"Cheer up, if this carries on we could become a very attractive takeover target.

Gloat

Bashful in Nashville

We Have A Lot To Cover.....

"That was a great ideaof yours, chester."

"Have you been throwing a lot of poop lately?"

"I got all Z's because I fell asleep in class."

'Can't he ever use a different kind of chart?'

'This chart shows how much time we waste every day looking at charts.'

Out.

Downward arrow on progress chart goes through the floor: 'OK, I know this doesn't look good ...'

'If you're out of quarterly earnings, I'll take the assets and liabilities breakdown.'

'And this is after the creation of a Special Effects Department.'

"I wouldn't stand there, if I were you."