Chinese Restaurant Fan T-Shirts

Misfortune cookies

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

Big Tex Silver Saddle Restaurant advertises 'BBQ, $10, Chatter in a Vanishing Regional Dialect $1.00 Extra.'

"I can't give you a prescription for milk and cookies."

"Hmmm ... you're right — I forgot the brie."

'Dial 1-900-Fortune.'

"Grass...Grass and more damn grass... What I wouldn't give for a lightly poached Dover sole with a garlic infused tarragon sauce."

Love is in the air...

"And exactly how is the peanut-butter-and-jelly prepared?"

"What did Jesus order?"

"Everything is dandy--and our intestinal biomes are joyous."

"Hmmm ... perhaps a pinot noir less spilly?"

"What's happened to Quiche?"

'When the doctor told you to warm up before exercising, I don't think he meant with hot chocolate and hot cross buns.'

Tuna Salad, Meat Loaf, Cheese Omelet and Bean Soup

"How about a little more coffee?"

Steam from dinner in restaurant forms dollar sign

"I could have sworn I had three sausages!"

"....and some apple pie for dessert...oh miss, remember that a la mode!"

"You know, it really wasn’t that bad."

'Right you lot, listen. Hands up for soup. . .'

"Now that everyone's in...how do we get the food?"

Nouveau wine

'My fortune says 'you can't be too thin, or too rich, or have too much computer memory'.'

'At these prices can't you afford a kitchen?' Burner at the table

'Sorry about that - Lenny accidentally used jumping beans.'

"It tastes and smells just like a glass of wine!"

"I'm told the omelettes here have a broader purpose."

"Pecan pie with rum-raisin ice cream is the best revenge."

'Pardon me, M'sieur -- Did you order 'grilled cheese' or 'chilled grease'?'

"Ah, Monsieur has made a very expensive choice!"

"There's our cure for the munchies! Gluten, we love your pizza!!" "You're our hero, gluten."

"Nah, he doesn't need the Heimlich. I just don't like his tip."

'May I recommend the red wine?'