Chimney Challengers Pillows

Santa Elevator

Do not think outside the box!

Bureaucrats held up by the workers.

'I'm writing my New Year's resolutions.' - 'I resolve to finish everything that I start.'

"And do you, Courtney, take this man....Courtney!"

'I'm sorry, but 'I'll see how I feel on the night' isn't really acceptable.'

When a nanosecond is forever.

Age 42: Still stuck at the children's table.

'I'd like to come over, but Mom cleaned my room and it's going to take me all day to put it right again.'

"Last one to the top's a geriatric."

2019, 2020 and 2021

'I have an even better idea, Steve -- let's get married without living together!'

Santa relaxes by Fire

'It's says here that you are 'kind to inferiors'. I'm surprised to learn that there are any...'

"I said to him eventually, I said marriage is something you're just going to have to do on your own."

"I think he stood on a nettle."

"I envy you. I'd love to have a house with a fireplace."

"It's unrealistic for us to have a chimney, tree, or stockings, so you can forget about Santa."

"What God has joined together let no man put asunder."

"Mom, Dad, am I adopted?"

Santa friendly home has giant chimney.

'No, man, I don't know where you're coming from. But if I had to guess, I'd say the early Seventies.'

Sanitizer

"Oh, yeah, tough guy? Well, maybe this is the night I mop up the floor with you."

'She's only a secretary, but she has her own suggestion box.'

'Santa Clause would never of fitted through that fireplace, so I've widened it.'

'To show I'm serious about giving up smoking for new year, I'm going to sign this pledge.'

'I think the eight reindeer just look tiny by COMPARISON.'

'Non confromists society annual dinner' "You can't come in mate...Its formal dress"

"O.K., leave me, but just remember, if you do I'm coming with you."

He used to do his own thing. Now they expect him to do someone else's thing.

'Your years of smoking like a chimney have taken their toll.'

"I'm not sure I can make it next week."

"I'm not going to shovel the walk. I'm cleaning my room."