Childhood Mischief Makers Pillows

'Boy, when I get tall you'll have to put all of the breakable stuff really high.'

'My lawyer told me to never put anything in writing.'

Kid in time-out writes 'it was the best of time out...'

Only a penny! A sensible and ingenious toy for children.

'But he qualifies for medicare in dog years.'

The Queen of Static Electricity: 'Hey, Jeffrey...I've got a physics question for you...The queen of static electricity is exempt! Hail me!!'

'You know that bottle of ink that was standing on the desk...?'

'It's okay sir, I'm private Johnson.'

'Mom! -- Jeffrey's pimping the wall!'

"I couldn't have made my family recipe raisin date nut cake with it's secret ingredient without Jimmy's help."

'Your Honor, my client pleads not guilty by reason of a sugar buzz.'

'Casey laughed so hard at lunch milk came out his nose...or as we say now... he had a liquid food malfunction.'

Child jumping on a table-tennis table.

It's sure been easier to mess around at work since we decided to bell the boss.

You put sparkling water in the WHAT?

'If you text for a glass of water one more time, Daddy's going to take away your cell phone.'

'All right, who broketh the window!'

"I told you we should have given them treats!"

"It's a note from Eddie's teacher. It seems he's stretched his imagination past the end of her rope."

"As you can see, we allowed you to bring your cell phones; however, this is hell, so even local calls will be charged as roaming."

"Just think, in dog years we'd be old enough to know better!"

'It's great to be a ventriloquist. I find that I can still talk in class, but I don't get in trouble.'

"Let's tell him we've been good. He probably won't call our bluff."

'Who gave you that black eye?'

'Grandma says she has the perfect wrestler nickname for me. What does Tiny Terror mean?'

'Norman, why is it you're the one who always gets detention.'

Urine sample

"Baldo, I'm sorry! Tia Carmen's friend Maria left this book here by accident. Silly me, I thought it was yours! Ha ha ha!"

"It didn't work -- My imaginary playmate refused to take the rap."

'I just got off the phone with your teacher. Next time you tell her you're from a 'broken home' don't forget to mention who broke most of it!'

A Foot Guard being teased by children.

By the way, my foot's asleep. So, I guess an unscrupulous woman who wanted to play footsie with me could pretty much get away with murder right now. !

'Mom, Jason is making negative robocalls about me!'

"Look at me. Still writing B.C. on my checks."

'Hey, Mom! -- You want to hear a dirty story?'