Childhood Ceo Gifts

A young boy sits behind a lemonade stand with a sign that reads "Lemonade 25¢ - Jay Antosh, Chief Executive Officer".

"So a play date next Tuesday, okay? Have your people call my people to set it up."

"He likes it."

A child stands behind a stand piled high with snowballs and a sign that reads "Hand-crafted snowballs 25¢".

'He had a meteoric rise to the top.'

Lemonade Inc.

SALE

$1: Family Secrets

"May I skip the usual Show & Tell and try to hustle some merch?"

"I hope you're not going to let this I.P.O. affect your grades."

'Currently I've got lemonade, 7% CDs, Discount Brokerage and No Minimum Passbook Savings. I'm going to miss banking deregulation.'

"This gives me the inner fulfillment I could never achieve through dodgeball."

Lemonade 5c Sugar Free: 'It sure is!'

'Not one customer all day! What's the matter with this corner?'

So tell me, Junior.

LEMONADE 50 CENTS, 'Sorry, cash only -- we don't accept little brothers.'

Man sees stand with kittens with sign, 'Free or best offer'.

"I don't mind him running his own tech company at his age. However, I wish he would, at least, dress his age."

Stuff Broken

"She's asking if it's fresh-squeezed. Should I tell her to f**k off?"

'Not a bad day. I started a phony company in computer lab, made a public stock offering over lunch hour and socked away fifteen million into an off-shore bank account before afternoon recess!'

"I don't understand people who say children should be seen and not heard. Why would anyone want to hear them?"

"Oh no, we've got a jumper!"

'I love you, your father loves you. Now go paint a masterpiece.'

Experience the regional flavors of 2163 Pigeonhole Lane.

"On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate our product?"

"For my bat mitzvah, my dad is getting me incorporated."

'I can tell when we're in a recession - my allowance gets cut.'

"I'm aware of that. Fortunately there are no child management laws."

'It's your mother -- are you here?'

Two kids are selling iced tea from roadside stands; one is selling regular iced tea for 50¢ a cup, while the other is selling Long Island ice teas for $5.00 a cup.

Of course it's real spring water. I got it out of this hose last April!

"We're shopping around for a new agency, and we thought you people might be interested in making a pitch."