Childhood Behaviors Pillows

"I screamed for ice cream and all I got was 15 minutes in the Time Out chair."

Joey discovers the difference between coffee beans and jelly beans.

"Her first word was 'paparazzi'. "

"Did I hear the dog in here?"

"I see that he is growing as fast as your law firm."

"Don't worry, dear. You'll grow."

'Sometimes I worry that I basically wasted my 2's.'

'Why don't they make thumb-flavored baby food?'

"They grow up so fast."

“She’s in her abstract expressionism phase.”

"Unfortunately, once the child contracts Pokémon, he lives with it forever."

Santa Claus's Mail

Mozart's First Movement - Baby Mozart is sitting on the potty.

"There was no other choice, Mom. It was a double dog dare."

'From six to to eighteen, they're always at that age.'

Fat Kid 10- Eats an ice-cream

"He likes it."

"Oh, I like coming to the dentists. It's the only place where people actually ask me to spit!"

T"ruly, Susan, I envy no man."

"She's been so creative lately."

'You gotta learn to talk, Jeffrey -- it's part of the aging process.'

"It only goes forwards and backwards. So, you won't need a GPS."

"Someday she'll solve the world's problems."

"He's not talking yet, but sometimes we give him peanut butter to make it look like he is."

"The way he stacks those blocks, I see repression, some hostility, and a lot of dissatisfaction with his place in society."

"I'm so proud - she's already learning her shapes."

Twenty-first century baby walker

(When I'm good I'm very very good, but when I'm bad I'm... Well….) (Horrid?)

'What's play?'

'He's not talking yet, but his texting skills are excellent...'

Baby sees bottle with math formula marked, 'Baby Formula'.

"He doesn't really talk yet, but he does some sound bites."

"I'm not eating cookies before dinner. I'm having cookies for dinner!"

"When did she start crawling?"

"Have mercy on me, Mama. Have mercy on Mr. Pitiful."