Child Care Enthusiast Pillows

'Next time your kid has a party, blow up the balloons with an airpump!'

'William, I've decided to go back to work so I can get a little rest during the day.'

Gifts for a cloned baby!

"Your children are adorable...and so shiny!" "Thanks. I them in dish detergent."

"I'm bored."

'Of course I put my kids first! Look at how much I pay the nanny!!'

"I never subscribed to Hobbes' state of nature theory until the night we left the kids without a sitter."

'So this is goodbye then!'

"With the baby-cam, there is no privacy."

'We're beta testing Goo-Goo Glass.'

Children's Nursery

"Congratulations! It's a pain in the ass."

'We are considering a nursery expansion.'

No bottle feeding.

'This might be a good time to discuss a few grievances.'

'Forget the wheel. Invent diapers.'

'Oh Sit down again and read your paper!'

Wee Folks Daycare

"I couldn't find a sitter."

'This is great. No dishes to wash!'

Women with her children of leashes passes dog walker with dogs so well trained they have no leashes.

New more powerful, furniture polish.

A baby biting a boys wristwatch

"Excuse me, can you tell me where I might find the colostrum?"

'Oh, wonderful! All day I've been waiting for that burp!'

'Your little one is giving the sitter a big kiss-of life.'

I wish my baby came with suction cups so there was a place to put him while I shower.

"Your nanny is paid to be patient with you."

'If kids have to be raised properly, does that hurt?'

The three p's: peeing, poohing, puking

'As a baby sitter, you shouldn't think of me as a bratty kid...think of me as a jobs creator!'

"I take my babysitting job very seriously."

"He's still defining his brand."

Different Perspectives on Childcare

Mozart's first movement: Leopold, come quick.'