Chihuahuas T-Shirts

'Well, I might not be able to fetch the newspaper for her, but she carries me around everywhere in her purse...'

'The problem with being a Chihuahua is that everybody calls me 'Pepe'... My name is actually Humphrey Reginald Windsor the Third...'

Shepherd and eurydice

"This is a lovely old song that tells of a young woman who leaves her cottage, and goes off to work. She arrives at her destination, and places some solid NHHS in a flask containing 0.50 atm ofammonia, and attempts to determine the pressures of ammonia and hydrogen sulide when equilibrium is reached."

Showbiz Awards

'It's good - but it's not digital quality.'

"Evidence suggests she was working on the puzzle, got up to make tea, husband enters and puts last piece in..."

Lennon and McCartney.

Academic Jeopardy ... 'What Was the Maiden Name of Dante Alighieri's Maternal Grandmother?'

"God, I hope no one asks me to sing."

Unforgettable, that's what you are... Gnat King Cole

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

King Kong uses fly spray against the pesky planes on top of the Empire State Building

Omara Portuondo

'Me, I don't spend my pocket money: I hoard it...'

A Fairytale Update

"After the show, I'll be autographing any computer or phone screens where my albums are streamed."

Anna Calvi

"Son, you're old enough now for The Talk: everything you need to know about compound interest."

'But Dad, all the other kids get a roth IRA as part of their allowance package.'

EWE 2.

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

"Woke up this morning, someone had nicked my guitar..."

George Michael

Red Letter Days - A declaration of love in public

Piracy on a boating lake

"Michael, your father and I are worried that you're awfully young to be singing the blues."

"Babe, I'm gonna leave you... It may take a few eons, but I am definitely gonna leave you..."

Squirrel putting nuts in a safe box.

"Bungle the flip! Bungle the flip!"

Victoria's pre-marriage questionnaire continues...'Can I get input from the guys at the bar on this one?'

"That is an outrageous slur."

Before the Internet

Fish, singing: 'I'm a sole man..'

Cut out and keep your own Frank Sinatra.