Charlady Gifts

"Huh! Men...."

It is best dealt with by the 'Pitch and Run Shot'.

Bernstein's got himself a driverless club

". . . So that's 4 birdies, 1 eagle, 2 ferrets and a rabbit!"

"Oh boy charades! I love charades! Something big? Is it a bird? It's sharp! Behind? Above?"

"Now, why didn't I think of that?"

'For a small extra charge, we can provide a specially-formulated digestive enzyme.'

'Two hundred and nineteen.'

Golf with a difference

"Pastrami. My favorite, Chad. But I asked for the 'sand wedge.'"

'No need for pump action, Al - it's the wife.'

'I thought chemistry experiments were after lunch.'

And if the ball is completely unplayable...

'Meat cooked, but carrots still hard.' Hand in pot

The Cat's Alarm Clock

'I'd recommend the 9 tine.'

'Where's my horse?'

"Blowing the whistle is perfect for a sports bar to let its patrons know that Happy Hour is over."

'Are you sure you don't have any Indian blood?.'

Goldylocks and the Three Beers.

No early morning tea past this landing

Sunshine and exercise. Are you glad I suggested we go for a walk?

'When I want your opinion I'll sack you!'

'Eh, love. The one armed bandit at the end of the bar isn't working.'

'You made me jump.'

'I don't eat red meat. That's ok, this is gone green.'

Ladies' Game

"Jim, just put that hole behind you."

"Give me one, three and five pints please."

Turd golf...

'When I first saw here I thought I'd died and gone to heaven, but not with beer at these prices!'

Woman serving tea from a huge barbecue-like teacup.

'Do I take it that you will not be requiring my services on the back nine?'

'This chicken has no taste or character.' 'I thought you wanted to eat it, not offer it a job.'