Chaotic Kitchen Explorers T-Shirts

"That's funny. . . that's usually his favorite meal!"

'Mildred-thy milk runneth over!'

Do you have any cookies you aren't using?

'Don't worry. They say the first 24 months of living in a house during remodeling are the hardest.'

"Yo - I'm way overdone in here!"

"Can you turn these mashed potatoes into french fries?"

Man's cooking explodes.

Vegetable Cook

How to correctly estimate cooking time

'And thanks be to the lord that we're going out to eat on Friday...'

'and then stand in dish for two hours.'

Ten out of ten for effort...

TV chef sets the TV on fire.

Girl who can't cook meets guy who can't fix stuff.

"I think the 'Exotic Recipe' diet will make me lose weight. I'm running all over town trying to find the ingredients!"

Anti-inflammation recipes

'Now time for a coffee while hubby cleans up the mess.'

'Who the heck told my wife I had rights to parental leave?'

Chef De Party.

Cooking

The world's worst restaurant. Now under new bad management.

Disaster in the kitchen.

'Gary freaked out a bit and went way off the griddle.'

'Do you want toast with that?'

Chef's Specials - Hissy Fits, Shouting and Swearing, Pompus Indigestion.

'All our family's creativity is channelled into finding ways to gain weight.

"Now why would a seagull fly in here and try to establish a rapport with me?"

'Oh, yes. We often have people around when my Wife cooks... Usually, the fire brigade.'

'Don't blame me - It's my husband's cooking!'

Woman in need of an extractor fan.

"The toaster is broken again, sweetheart."

Cook au vin

Chef: 'Howz that Octopus coming along Jeff?'

"You were supposed to have invented fire!"

One reason secret family recipes are usually best kept secret.