Chaotic Chef Gifts

"This year WE EAT LIKE WOLVES."

'You've done it AGAIN,Doris- you've bought CAT food!!'

Halloween may be a little different this year.

"Bungle the flip! Bungle the flip!"

Is that pancake ready yet?

"I've had it with you guys! From now on, have your arguments on your own time!"

'Muriel's philosophy is that what happens in the kitchen, stays in the kitchen.'

Cafe Burns.

Vegetable Cook

Recipe involving the switching off of the smoke alarm...

Snow & Flo series: Questionable cooking.

"Shouldn't you use a plate?"

Anti-inflammation recipes

'Who the heck told my wife I had rights to parental leave?'

'I couldn't find my measuring cups, so I had to kind of wing it with the stuffing.'

"It's a recipe from the 'Anti-Christ' cookbook."

'You made me jump.'

It's all gravy.

'Beat 3,000 eggs and add one quart of 10-30W oil? So much for putting my recipes on the computer.'

Chef's Specials - Hissy Fits, Shouting and Swearing, Pompus Indigestion.

'It isn't supposed to taste good. It's furniture polish.'

Recipes.

A short-order cook gets sucked into the exhaust vent over the grill.

'Let's forget the duck de la margola and order something else!' (man seeing duck fleeing from cook).

Cook and Octopus

'Barry, I think I know where you left the champagne bottle.'

"All right, we straighten this out immediately! René threw the bouillabaisse at Jacques, no? The Jam-bon en croûte was thrown by Jacques at René, correct? The truite en gelée and the fraises des bois were thrown by François at Henri, and Henri threw the mousse au chocolat at François, and . . ."

'The casserole didn't make it.'

"Here comes the tossed salad!"

"Larry's made new friends learning to cook. He knows everyone at the Recipe Emergency Hotline."

Cook spills food and has to open a can (tin).

Out and In.

"Do you like eye of newt in your Mac 'n' Cheese?"

Tsunami in the cooking pot.

"Mum, the milk's trying to escape!"