Certainty Seekers Gifts

"What's come over Heisenberg? He seems to be certain about everything these days."

"Let's say you've always wanted to make someone a mixtape to show them how much you care about them. What's the best order? Do you start with songs about how rich you are before moving on to the songs about love? Or vice versa?. . .What order would best simulate sincerity?"

"Honey! Where are my lucky Incredible Hulk board meeting socks?!?"

"Any questions?"

'You were right Doc: Jumping over the monn did boost my self esteem!'

"They’re real."

The vice-president in charge of sincerity

'You have no idea how hard I've gotta work just to maintain my indie cred around here!'

"My resume is concise, succinct and eloquently worded. I only hope they know what I'm talking about."

Why weren't we born rich instead of beautiful?

"People are looking for stability in pension arrangements..."

"I'm spending more time promoting myself than I am being myself."

Introducing Ambient Books: No beginning...no middle...no end...just a bunch of sentences specially written to soothe and relax the reader.

Business coach hiding in speach desk.

Woman walking into Inner Beauty Salon.

Eureka

"Excuse me sir, is this the environment..?"

"I don't care what you think: it's cool, it's sexy, and I feel totally empowered."

"In light of current market conditions, I've diversified your portfolio to include Lotto tickets and bingo chips."

Today on the Ask Sadie Show, we'll be addressing one single topic: Wondering. In my day, when a body said I wonder why dust bunnies are called dust bunnies, it led to all sorts of delightful speculation. We could while away hours debating whether it was a marketing ploy by big broom ... or whether it dated back to Napoleon, who had a fetish for dirty rabbits. And if we were lucky, opinions could get so heated that fisticuffs would ensue. Wondering is just one of many lovely human experiences utt

"I'm not an AI, I'm a human being."

'Some people say they're ego-compensation, but what do they know.'

How Gary got his groove back.

Children watching a horse show from under the tent

Gambling on office building construction

'You must stop feeding him fish oils to make him cleverer.'

'So, your anger management class is working?'

"I was just like you, then I hired a life coach. Now look at me!"

"Looks like something exciting is happening in R&D."

'You have a 9:00 A.M. appointment with your ophthalmologist to check your vision and a 11:00 A.M. appointment with the staff to rally the troops around your vision.'

'I lost my shoe, but I got my foot in the door.'

And if you press that one, somebody will come in and tell you what a great job you're doing.

Oil explodes from the wishing well.

"Don't make us warn you again, monkey. Stay outa the curiosity racket."

'I AM going to join a gym, but I've got to get in shape first. . .'