Centenarian Worker Gifts

'It's nice to see you all,but I was just going out to work.'

"Careful."

Duel in a wheelchair.

'Come die with me.'

'When 900 years you reach, retire, you will not.'

"He's one hundred and five years old and I think it's disgusting!"

"He said his goal was to make it to 100."

"Meanwhile, in the Memory Care Unit... I said, your secret’s safe with me."

"Television repairs....Don't you want to see my identity?"

Potts is having a job keeping up with the young turks.

Fetch the Walker

'He's disappointed with the Queen's card - he wanted a rude one!'

"Get a computer?! Do I look as though I have room in here for a computer?"

'Second childhood, eh?'

'One hundred is the new ninety!'

'I don't see how you were able to work for so many years. Since you've retired you can't do a thing.'

'Well, if you were on the verge of 100, I'd let you reach it.'

I was considered a part time employee since I only worked one night a year and thus wasn't eligible for the pension plan, so here I am in my golden years.

"He doesn't seem to be accepting retirement too well."

Nil by care

'I thought you received a letter from the Queen. But I didn't know you got a present as well!'

US Deficit

'How did things go down at the glacier today, dear?'

Age Cards.

"Who wants to be 100? Only 99-year olds..."

'I have a metal plate in my head, a tin ear and brass balls...direct me to a junk yard.'

27 Years in the same Vocation.

Retirement

"I've worked here for thirty years..."

Elder Abuse: 'You're a dwarfish shrub and your berries taste horrid.'

"Don't trust anyone whose job was created after 1995."

'He is the local gigolo - his pension plan collapsed and he can't afford to retire.'

"Old? I'll say she's old- she had a telegram on her hundredth- from Queen Boadicea!"