Cellphone Satirist Gifts

Dawing your Cellphone

'Before you can enter, you need to punch in the verification code so we can be certain that you're a real soul,'

"Would you relax? They never look up."

"Now you can send it."

Kid arrives with CCTV camera, saying: 'It followed me home, can we keep it?'

'I don't like reading on screen, so I'm printing the internet to look at it later.'

'for more obit info, go to...'

There's a lot of crying out there! Looks like we were gnawing on the internet cable...

"At last! - A text from Godot!!"

"Today, charges that Putin hacked Trump's tweets..."

'It's a text from Mike - Sorry I'm L8 B THR in a crrrrassssssh!!! ARRRRGGGHHH....;p'

"I'm looking for a data plan that will be constantly out of service so I can tell my dates I didn't mean to ghost them."

"Is there someone have called Frobisher?"

"You have reached the Office of Status Quo. Relax. No need to listen carefully. Our menu options never change."

Yeah, I'm standing here alone yelling a bunch of nonsense. If I had a cell phone, you wouldn't bother me!

It's your replacement for 'Nimrod'!

iPhone: Leading Our Grand March Into Mass Mediocrity

Lies on the Internet

Amoeba mitosis Divorce

'Please hold for an eternity...'

'If we are to have effective communication with our partner organisations, it's probably best if we do not use text messaging.'

'You want to feel happy? There's an app for that.'

'No thanks. This patch stops me craving for superflous functions.'

A dog is embarrassed by his actions when recorded on his owner's mobile phone.

'I hope you don't want to leave a message - he hates messages.'

White Apple

Busker ignored because of the rise of MP3 players.

"Hey, Tarzan – no need to yell."

No Texting

STRIP Hambone: Woman referred to as software

"You now fit all mobile devices!"

Data at landfill

The primitive age: 'Do you know that the 'i stone2' was released?'

'You get all the money and both cars? How is THAT fair?'

'We get along so much better after I disabled the 'Comments' function of our relationship!'