Celestial Style Seeker T-Shirts

'The halo is nice, but I would've preferred a tiara.'

'Something for the weekend, Sir?'

'Now that I've lost weight, I can't afford new clothes in my size.'

Two women wearing identical dresses head toward exchange window at department store.

"Can you make wishes on fake eyelashes?"

"Oh to be young and in love and wear things cut on the bias."

'Awright...Who's the dirty, lowdown varmint who's copyin' my plaid-shirt-and-stone-wash-jeans-with-matching-boots-and-vest ensemble?'

Pampered and poodled.

"I can never get my sunglasses on my head the way my hairdresser does"

"And now. . . which shoes?"

'These fit just right. Do you have anything too tight?'

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."

Life Store Guide: Make-up and jewellery

Goldilocks and the seventeen black shoulder bags

"Are you looking to accentuate or camouflage?"

'Sure I'm late. . . I not only have to get ready for school. . . now I have to get ready in case some idiot takes my picture for YouTube.'

Mister Pretty Shoes

'They've certainly got designs on your purse!'

"Let's try for dignified yet playful, while maintaining the spirit of preservation."

"I don't like your application."

"Do you do much walking?"

"Some fitting room. Nothing fits!"

"I feel there's a whole culture around mules."

"It's really quite simple: Shave off the soul patch and the car is yours."

"You won't believe this but I haven't a thing to wear"

'I'll take it!'

Elegant woman in backless dress.

A member of a very populous consumer group attempts to go shopping...

Changing Room Decisions

"Of course, lots of women are just going bare-headed."

'Can I have mine with the peak at the front '

'Mon Dieu! This year, your collection is really daring, mon cher Karl!'

Notice: this dress will be out of style by January 2009.

Tuck Shop

'I washed the gray right out of my hair, but now I can't get the gray out of my tub.'