Celestial Jet-setters T-Shirts

"Who knew we could take our Frequent Flyer miles with us?"

Largest passenger aircraft ever built. "Why does it have to be so big?" "We had to make extra room for all the subsidy money."

"We've waited twenty-five years to make this trip, and we're certainly not interested in getting there in any six and a half hours."

Business-Class.

"Hell: The Airport"

'Round-the-world ticket please!' - 'One way?'

"Have you decided where to travel?"

"Well that's just great!! I guess we really are flightless birds now!!"

'Beat it'

Travel Agent - Building not finished

"New York are at Lunch, Munich are at Coffee and Tokyo are at Lunch."

God changes the channel with his remote.

"The possibilities are endless!" "The possibilities ended."

Qantas London Sydney

"No, harps aren't mandatory. You could've asked for any instrument you wanted."

Flight nap

'It's $15 to check a bag and $25 if you want it to arrive at your destination.'

'And one more thing, while you're in Bangkok be careful of the ladies in Patpong district. They may not be all they appear to be.'

"Any chance of an upgrade?"

"Hi, scheduling? I might be a little late. I'm stuck in traffic."

'I'm tired of being a jet-setter. I want to settle down, raise kids, run my own airline...'

"So where are you off to today Wanda?" "......ummmmm......."

'Want to buzz the airport?'

'Why isn't there zero tolerance to drugs and alcohol?'

Excess Baggage: Anyone who think business travel is glamorous should have a talk with a business traveler.

"Cynthia! Bridle your enthusiasm."

Fiscal Responsibility

The Many Faces of Bev

Ask Sadie. If you were to win $100 million in the Mega Lottery, do you think the money would change you? How would you spend it? - Billy, a long-time fan. *Actual reader letter. First, I'd do my part to cure world hunger, then give to needy children, then help pay downs some of the national debt, then … Wait, lemme reorder a bit. First I'd buy the Yankees, then world hunger, then needy children. No first the Yankees, then a private jet, then gum, then the needy whatchamacallits. Children. Turn

"Really looks like they could use a miracle about now sir!"

"Milan, Rio, Sydney, Oslo - I never know when he's going to jet off next."

"Which way to departures?"

"Our gold-plus members get live-streaming of economy class so you can see how cramped and irritable they are."

'The stars are amazing out here in the country.'

"Is this going to be a full flight?"