Jetsetters T-Shirts

"Is this going to be a full flight?"

'I knew the airport was low on parking spaces, but this is ridiculous.'

Qantas London Sydney

Ask Sadie. If you were to win $100 million in the Mega Lottery, do you think the money would change you? How would you spend it? - Billy, a long-time fan. *Actual reader letter. First, I'd do my part to cure world hunger, then give to needy children, then help pay downs some of the national debt, then … Wait, lemme reorder a bit. First I'd buy the Yankees, then world hunger, then needy children. No first the Yankees, then a private jet, then gum, then the needy whatchamacallits. Children. Turn

'All we have for Paris is a flight that makes a detour over Iran. It's a drone.'

Travel Agent - Building not finished

"So where are you off to today Wanda?" "......ummmmm......."

"Hi, scheduling? I might be a little late. I'm stuck in traffic."

"Your luggage is 1 kg over, they'll be a charge for that

"Well that's just great!! I guess we really are flightless birds now!!"

"Of course this is an emergency, I'm out of coffee!"

Airlines

"Hawaii, where are you folks going?"

"First class, or with children?"

"Business doesn't take a summer vacation."

Fighter Jet Sneeze

Man packing suitcase with French vocabulary

'Are we there yet?'

"If God had meant us to fly, he'd give us more leg room!"

Travelling

'We will be 3 minutes late taking off. . . the pilot has to piddle.'

'Sir, will that be business or first class?'

"Think we'll still make happy hour?"

'What was that?!' 'A 'Mach'-ing bird.'

'If we have only fractional ownership, it's not a private jet anymore, is it?'

A private jet takes off

"This seat with extra legroom is great."

'We don't know which gate flight 311 to Denver is boarding. These are the menus.'

'At this time, we would like to call those passengers who feel compelled to board before their row numbers are announced.'

"Sorry for the wait. Have you guys been here long?"

Largest passenger aircraft ever built. "Why does it have to be so big?" "We had to make extra room for all the subsidy money."

"Now boarding group 50 and up."

"If your luggage is in your clothes it doesn't count!"

Private Jet

'He must be going economy!'