Celestial Humor Enthusiast Pillows

"A lot of them I only pretend to watch over."

'Welcome to heaven buddy! We got some stronger stuff inside, but this will get you into the mood.'

"There, would you believe it - Made in China!"

"I don't know about this freelancing. I'd like someone to guard."

'I guess we should have expected blue laws up here.'

'I still feel empty.'

'What? -- I send you all this great sunlight, and you waste it growing PROTOPLASM?'

'The bathroom? It's that cumulonimbus, the third cloud on the right.'

'Stay back from the edge. Remember what happened to the last angel that fell.'

'I miss the evildoers.'

"In hindsight, I probably should have had more than concepts of a plan."

"Just a few more minutes. The system's down but we got a guy working on it."

"Everything else is great. I'm just saying... a little advance notice would have been nice."

"Sorry, y'all, I really wanted to make it out tonight but I'm waning..."

"We're thinking about getting a little pied-a-terre in hell."

"Oh, and c.c. the Devil."

"They say it takes 10,000 hours to perfect something- I guess I was a bit hasty throwing that together in 144."

"Good game."

"I never knew God was such a sports fan."

'I don't remember predetermining THAT!'

"I'm just glad we got out before interest rates went up again."

"If you get to the pitchfork-shaped cloud, you've gone too far."

"Unbelievable! A tick!"

"I don't know… Did you try Googling it?"

'She barely made it out of the atmosphere... next!'

Water is discovered on the moon....

'Looks like somebody needs to lay off of the authentic angel food cake!'

'It's all done with computer animation now.'

"And where do you see yourself in the next 7-8 billion years?"

Halo Frisbee.

"Would you like to leave a message? He's on the throne"

"You're a physician? Let me ask you about a problem that I've been having."

'Those are the Divinity students.'

"I must have pressed the wrong button."

Solar Gain: "Be honest: does the new planet make me look fat?"