Celebrating Senior Years Gifts

Getting Old with Gramps.

"She fell down stairs again, so this is her third hip."

"Hey. Whatever happened to our sexual relations? "

'Oh, relax - you're doing great for your age...but I am a little concerned about out computer's old operating system.'

Lilly was too far from the phone to complain about her new stairlift.

Road rage on a mobility scooter.

"I get it! I get it! Elephants never forget. Now quit bragging about it!"

"I need something that says, 'Let's party,' but in a fiscally responsible manner."

How to identify the alarming mood swings of male menopause.

How are you feeling today? I feel just like a newborn baby. Really? Yes. No hair, no teeth, and I think I just wet my pants.

Pensioner's Romance

'There is a fancy name for your condition...Let's just call it 86 and counting.'

'...makes a change from the zimmer frames!'

"He's dead- but that's normal for his age."

"You know you're getting old when you need a hearing aid to hear your bones creak."

"I'm thinking of letting my bangs grow out."

"America's Funniest Colonoscopy Videos."

"You're not goin' anywhere, Roy. You buried your own nuts again."

Old Love

"Seventy-seven. How about yours."

To make taking their daily array of medicines more fun, many seniors are using the new Pill-A-Pult.

"I didn't know you could do wheelies Stan."

'Can you spare a cup, for the bottom of my bird cage?'

Pension in race with tortoise and snail.

"Let's face it,Rhoda-you're no spring chicken yourself!"

Love Fest 50th Reunion: Sewing any remaining wild oats encouraged!

Birthday cakes on porch on hot day

Old Golfers never die...only those who get in their buggies way!

"Last one to the top's a geriatric."

'Dang! The Hoopers have been force-feeding vitamins again.'

'I'm at an age where my back 'goes out' more than I do!'

"How's your memory?"

'Didn't anyone tell you this is an old people's home?'

'I feel just like a newborn baby. . . Yes, no hair, no teeth, and I think I just wet my pants.'

As a louder and more satisfying alternative to clapping, Lily uses her bingo wings.