Cautious Foodie T-Shirts

"Nope, I'll have to pass on lunch today!"

But is it organic?

'Personally I can't see anything wrong with GM crops!'

"I'll have the egg-yellow omelette."

"Please don't kill me."

"For dessert, absolutely no flambé!"

'Diet considerations.'

'Fish has mercury, meat has e-coli, veggies have pesticides, desserts cause obesity...so we'll have the health-concious nothing for dinner' special.'

"There's a big green giant at the door!"

'I told you that 2 month old balonie was cursed!'

"Young man, the world is your oyster, but for God�s sake avoid peanuts, soy, milk, eggs, wheat, fish, tree nuts, and chocolate."

'Non-alcohol beer, unsalted potato chips and tofu hot dogs? Why did you accept a party invitation from a cardiologist?'

'We thank you for this food and ask you to protect us from pesticides, additives and preservatives.'

'Trade you lunches?'

"Is everything all right? Any reactions to the irradiated carrots, the transgenic tomatoes, or the antibiotics in the chicken?"

Angel's Food cake vs Devil's food cake.

"You might say I'm middle-of-the-road. I'd buy a fur coat but I wouldn't buy a Japanese fur coat."

"Tonight's specials include beef wellington (long regarded as a major source of cholesterol and saturated fat), Cajun-style swordfish (suspected of containing PCBs and toxic metals), and chicken teriyaki (recent increase in the incidence of salmonella whi

Complex Carbs

'Do you, Freddie Finicky, promise to eat all your dinners up?'

All You Can Eat Buffet: "Remember, my safe word is 'Diabetes.'"

"I'd like a vanilla cupcake with buttercream icing on the side."

"It was a cold night, like tonight, back, I'd say, in 1954."

"It appears your high sodium bacon is playing havoc with your blood pressure."

Oysters in June - delicious!

Food that is good for you and food that is good for drug companies.

'Not only can we build it for the same price as any other gingerbread house, but we can do it for 40% less carbs and no trans fats!'

'The health plate is low in sodium, cholesterol, and sugar -- the downside is that it's high in styrofoam.'

The food inspector

"I never saw such overweight mice before."

'When it comes to our Boef flambe safety is paramount.'

After eating here for years, I've come down with abdominal pain and fatigue. Oh yeah? Also, irritability, sleep problems, headaches, loss of appetite, inexplicable weight loss, vomiting and constipation. Also, it took me three whole hours to figure out my new Apple watch, so chalk me up for learning difficulties. You're not by chance trying to get in one last lawsuit before Trump deregulates everything, are you? Heavens, no. Just feeling a little lead-poisony is all I'm saying.

'What exactly is 'Haggis'?'

"Sometimes I come up here and think about the great meals I've eaten."

"He's really healthy, except for the grilled cheese."