Cattle Driver Gifts

"Are we there yet?"

"Tell us again how you took five thousand head out to Kansas City and made it back in time to pick up the kids from gymnastics."

"Fast forward to the part where you herd me."

"Dunno which one of 'em did it, but we just got two stars on Rate Yer Driver."

'Cattle Driver.'

How Do You Like My Moseying Along?

'So what's it like riding in first class?'

Thru versus Through Traffic

Steep Hill, Slippery When Wet, Watch for Cars Going Faster Than You.

'Do you think he's ready for the big round-up?'

'Cool! Brownstar Wars!'

'We're taking over tonight, it's the only way to save the farm.'

Music to drive ( others mad) to...

A 'Falling Rock' and a 'Deer Crossing' zone.

A man in a car waits for a large herd of cows to cross the road; once they have crossed he finds a cow sitting in the passenger seat of his car.

"Ralph's smart car not only drives better than he does, it also works better. So we fired him and hired the car."

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

Acme. Breakable prop transporter.

Bumper stickers: 'Keep on Truckin''; 'Keep on Trunkin''.

Yes, That Was The Exit

"You must be the newly qualified driver."

Lanes Closed for the Hell of It

Sister Cities

YONDER...next 347 miles.

'I hate to tell you this, but enlightenment just isn't for commuters.'

Recalculating!

"Remember, when you back up, make that 'beep beep' sound."

'Trucker's tan?'

No Cheap Fuel Ahead: Easy Street Ends.

Gas: Regular/Hi-Test/Testosterone

"Wouldn't it be easier to have sat nav fitted?"

"Awfully quiet... Must be a big game on!"

'Yeah, the job's got great benefits, but mainly I like the safe work environment.'

'That last hill was a bit steep!'

Cars feeding at a gas tanker on the side of the road