Casual Punster Pillows

'To save the state the expense of a trial, I thought I'd run off to Spain.'

Contrary to popular belief, the road to Hell is paved with a comprehensive, lifetime tax return.

"Ladies first. Actually, it's safety first. But ladies are definitely a close second."

'Jurassic Pork.'

'Will I live Doctor?' 'Yes, but I don't advise it!'

Dogs life

Kick Me! (sign on an anthropomorphized soccer ball)

"Igor, you fool! I said 'healthy brain'!"

Note Book

'We had an Old Testament skit today. Al Sims was the Hittite, and I was the hittee.'

'I'd never bite the hand that feeds me - but I won't pull its finger, either.'

"No, I'm not a hare, I just happen to have big ears..."

'Gluten-free manna will come in the second salvo.'

"I take it you'l like to open joint accounts. . ."

Hamlet.

'If you want to improve your golf score, the best wood to use is a pencil with an eraser.'

'My mom says an apple a day keeps the physician's assistant away.'

'My broker swears it's a great investment but I fear it's just another pyramid scheme.'

Professional Cell Phone Accessories

'I'm the veterinarian of Cheshire who spays and neuters Cheshire pets.'

'Hey, Lady, this is a sixty zone!'

'I think he'll be okay. He had a mild brush stroke.'

Surfin' the web.

Lawyer Xing

'I have a rasp in my throat.'

Timmy Gets Solitary.

'Well it was fine on the straight but when it hit the last curve the cartoonist lost his perspective!'

Wash and Let My People Go

"They weren't very friendly when they proscuted me for obtaining loans under false names."

'I hope you get an ice cream headache!'