Casual Partner Gifts

"This is Dave, my friend plus."

Speed Dating for Turtles

'I've tried all night without potting a ball.' - 'Try taking away the wooden frame.'

'The second diet of my diet is always the easiest. By then, I'm off my diet.'

Snail Racing

Vinnie's Billiards: 'Heck of a break, Ron!'

'The ball never goes where I hit it.'

Shopper in grocery store sees TV dinners marked daytime and prime time.

"And I never kiss in the first two seconds."

"Sorry, had to barf real quick... so where were we?"

'She broke up with me because I'm a stray and, thus, always have fleas!'

"You're only as old as you feel, right, honey? And today, I feel like being 24!"

"If at first you don't succeed, buy me another drink."

"Yoga has helped me appreciate the healing power of donuts."

Valentine man in underpants.

The Awkwardly Informal Meet Up Group

"She stood me up. I hosed off my Crocs for nothing."

'Did you see a ball come this way?'

Caddy With A Cool Box

Tunnel of like

I never realized what a bad golfer I was until somebody else kept score. Club House.

'I'm making pot pie.'

"I think you may need to start seeing me twice a week for a while."

"Having a dog is great for meeting more dogs."

'Actually I'm looking for a less meaningful relationship. I didn't understand the last one!'

"Thanks, but no thanks -- Valentines just lead to the hard stuff."

"I'm counting that as a stroke for each time you went around."

'Am I safe in assuming that your requirements do not include a formal dining room?'

Welcome to Springdale...'We're number 10, 11, or maybe 12!'

Retirement

"I don't think I'm ever going to get a hole in one!"

"I wasn't ghosting you I promise!"

'At least I'm doing my part and getting out there!!'

"I know what you mean, Mary - after a while all the guys start to sound the same to me, too."

'I couldn't break 100, so I bought new clubs and took lessons and now I can't break 120!'