Casual Dating Gifts

Valentine man in underpants.

Speed Dating for Turtles

"Why are staring at my boobs? What do you hope to find there?"

"If at first you don't succeed, buy me another drink."

"You know how to please, but not to love."

'Fancy a game of five-a-side, boys?'

"And I never kiss in the first two seconds."

"Once you get over the three hundred and sixty eight texts it took to plan this, it really is nice to get together."

'She broke up with me because I'm a stray and, thus, always have fleas!'

"Sorry, had to barf real quick... so where were we?"

"That's where the tenured faculty members hang out."

"You're only as old as you feel, right, honey? And today, I feel like being 24!"

Fini. That show was schmaltzy, way too sentimental. I'll never criticize anything that can be described as "cheesy"!

The Awkwardly Informal Meet Up Group

Tunnel of like

'Last night Gary put me in an impossible position.'

'There's nothing worth watching on TV, but he's not going to let a little thing like that stop him.'

"She stood me up. I hosed off my Crocs for nothing."

"Thanks, but no thanks -- Valentines just lead to the hard stuff."

'Actually I'm looking for a less meaningful relationship. I didn't understand the last one!'

"Having a dog is great for meeting more dogs."

'I'm making pot pie.'

Pizza Party

"I woke up this morning with a pain in my neck. That her lying there?"

The post-game meal

Private thoughts of a television. I'd love the chance to ad lib just once!

"I know what you mean, Mary - after a while all the guys start to sound the same to me, too."

"I wasn't ghosting you I promise!"

"Yeah, the internet's full of information, but after a day broadening my superficial knowledge of casual interests, who has time to think?

"By breaking the seal on this dress, you accept the terms and conditions printed on my panties."

Lovers' Leap/Casual Daters' Escalator

Sleeping With Strange Men

"Did you use a condom?"

"Olympics? It's the first I've heard of the Olympics being on."

"I try to be royal without being regal."