Casual Daters Gifts

'Fish with benefits.'

'She broke up with me because I'm a stray and, thus, always have fleas!'

"This is a special night, so instead of an order from the car, we'll go inside!"

Speed Dating for Turtles

'Fancy a game of five-a-side, boys?'

"And I never kiss in the first two seconds."

"Once you get over the three hundred and sixty eight texts it took to plan this, it really is nice to get together."

"Sorry, had to barf real quick... so where were we?"

"That's where the tenured faculty members hang out."

Man visits palm reader with 'Doing Anything Tonight?' written on his hands.

"If at first you don't succeed, buy me another drink."

Fini. That show was schmaltzy, way too sentimental. I'll never criticize anything that can be described as "cheesy"!

Valentine man in underpants.

The Awkwardly Informal Meet Up Group

Tunnel of like

"She stood me up. I hosed off my Crocs for nothing."

'There's nothing worth watching on TV, but he's not going to let a little thing like that stop him.'

'Actually I'm looking for a less meaningful relationship. I didn't understand the last one!'

"Thanks, but no thanks -- Valentines just lead to the hard stuff."

"Having a dog is great for meeting more dogs."

Retirement

"I wasn't ghosting you I promise!"

"I know what you mean, Mary - after a while all the guys start to sound the same to me, too."

'At least I'm doing my part and getting out there!!'

"By breaking the seal on this dress, you accept the terms and conditions printed on my panties."

Sleeping With Strange Men

"Ladies and gentleman, the President of the United States."

"Did you use a condom?"

"Don't be shy. W'=e're real casual around here."

Lovers' Leap/Casual Daters' Escalator

"I wasn't asking for all of the best years of her life-just a couple of good nights."

'Oh no, we just met today: He's what you would call my 'catch of the day'...'

"This is Dave, my friend plus."

'Like they say, if it ain't broke, date it.'

'Maybe some other time.'