Casual Eating Gifts

"Moist towelette to cleanse your palate?"

"This place has the best happy hour."

"M'lady, we’ve reached peak Brooklyn."

"First I drink, then I barbecue — that's my secret."

'But Mom, I like potatoes in their jackets.'

"And I'm teaming that burned sausage up with a warm, flat local lager."

Joe's Kaff for Dinners! And Afters Too!

"Fresh pepper?"

"I'll have the drum an sea bass, the house salad and the techno nachos!"

"Wait, those crunchy, cheesy little fish thingies are free?!"

"Any of you guys feel like hot dogs?"

'The second diet of my diet is always the easiest. By then, I'm off my diet.'

How The Sausage Is Eaten

'You want to eat out tonight? -- What if we get addicted to good food?'

Gifts from the House of Low Goals.

Shopper in grocery store sees TV dinners marked daytime and prime time.

"My boss said I have narcolepsy. She could have waited to tell me after I woke up."

'You'll love this, it has no nutritional value.'

Waiter does not want to see customer make bubbles in his wine.

"I like Casual Dining, but this is too casual. I ordered spaghetti!"

If you're looking for a good time, you'll find it; if you can't find it, it will find you....

"Yoga has helped me appreciate the healing power of donuts."

Ketchup Kafe...Where Kondiment is King!

"You're only as old as you feel, right, honey? And today, I feel like being 24!"

"I'm allergic to penicillin—is there penicillin in the salad?"

'We have a strict dress code. Can't let you in without a straightjacket and tie.'

'Trying to eat her dinners is the only exercise I get.'

"Guac-A-Mole"

"You need a hobby."

'Thanks for the invite: Don't cook anything fancy, I eat pretty much anything...'

'I've decided to give up giving up!'

'What kind of...'

"Never mind the vintage, we just want to get pissed."