Casual Converser Gifts

Shallow End (Slightly innocuous statements) - Deep End (a little more weighty)

"I'd love to chat longer, but I've got to get this guy to a hospital."

'Um, hey, Bill, um... sorry to bother you, but, um... you didn't by any chance have purple parachute straps, did you?'

'This wine speaks for itself.' 'Howdy!'

'You must be Jim's new gardener. I'm his neighbour, Gerald. Had any luck with the Petunias this year? Aren't those Jim's feet sticking out of the ornamental pond?'

-Sorry about yesterday, I was ill! -You didn't look ill when I saw you at the races! -You didn't see me after the fifth leg!

'She'll never look for me here.'

"How are you enjoying the job?" "Oh, Ilove the job...it's the work that I hate."

'All right!! Bull's-eye!'

'Hold on, Bob. I'm downshifting.'

'Fred is a social conservative -- he believes in slow food and heavy beer.'

"That's where the tenured faculty members hang out."

'Maybe we could hold the wedding on 'Casual Friday'.'

The Schmoozy Reaper

"Oh, the usual - spreading pestilence and misery. You?"

Just a little heads up!

"I've got a very responsible job. If anything goes wrong, I'm responsible."

'It's a doughnut - just eat it!'

"Oh, just cellaring. You?"

"It's beginning to appear as if I'll never have greatness thrust upon me."

'I drink to bring about change.'

"Some days I really wish I had finished med school. Not that I ever started med school."

"You don't have to schedule a follow-up visit. You just come back whenever you want."

'Last night Gary put me in an impossible position.'

"You want fries with that Chardonnay?"

"Round of golf or a round of drinks?"

"Sir, you said that it's high time to fix the problem, so I rearranged the furniture, watered the flowers and made fresh coffee. If that wasn't enough then maybe we should find some problems that fit our solutions."

"My gut instinct was to say yes. . . but years in social work have shown me how these things end up working out."

'Is it just me, or is it REALLY temperate in here?'

Man with t-shirt 'I *spade* my dog'.

"I hate rhetorical questions. Know what I mean?"

"Sorry. I was expecting the lady. I can see you're busy. I'll call sometime. We'll do lunch."

'Yes of course he can borrow my lawn mower just as long as he only uses it in my garden...'

"It's probably bad news if she refers to the second date as 'mission creep.' "

'In my experience, for good to triumph over evil, it needs a little help from the NEUTRAL.'