Cartoon Conversationalist Gifts

So, what brings you two here today? Amanda Kern. Comics counseling.

'Run, run, as fast as you can!'

Fiscal cliff - US dollar falling over the edge.

Barbeque Casualty.

"Can you juggle a household, three kids, and a career?"

"Now there's something you don't see everyday. How long have you been using dachshunds as sled dogs.?"

"Spoiler alert! I'm about to tell you the part that really bugged me about 'Wolverine.'" "You don't have to say 'spoiler alert,' minion. It's been a month." "Anyone who hasn't seen it yet has not fulfilled their role as a dutiful consumer, and deserves whatever spoilage they will receive." "In fact, let me know who they are and I'll enter them into my database. When the corporatist revolution comes, there will be consequences." "Um... never mind."

"I don't think I can fit that into my schedule, Irv. I've got a fishing boat to attack this morning, a beach to terrorize this afternoon and a feeding frenzy this evening!"

'It's not much of a soap opera with just that Adam guy.'

Snowman ice fishing.

'It's not a desert island - it's Australia.'

'Ugh, we've got termites, destructive little pests.'

'We'll see significant savings in health care costs with our new in-house operations.'

"Now can I be in one of your comics?"

'No, Rusty, this one! You're barking up the wrong tree.'

'Casual Friday's never caught on in this department.'

"Well, I'm not a lone wolf on purpose! I was separated from my pack over three months ago and I can't find it again. . ."

"Why... are there so many people who never eat pork? Because we have some excellent PR people working on our behalf."

"A cluck cluck here and a cluck cluck there,...is that all I meant to you?"

'I don't know why I'm so unpopular - I haven't got a nasty bone in my body.'

"About time they did something about the rats!"

"I've invented the wheel. We're going to be rich."

Punch Initials - O

"We want you to design the drainage system so that we have a muddy backyard..."

Mask Autumn

'Go on Darling, play in the soil-pit for a while...'

'Hey, I made a hole in Juan.'

"...I've only got four pairs of hands you know"

Rudolph's off-season side hustle

Student: 'Is the medical marijuana thing a grass-roots movement?'

Sigh. They never ask me to play.

Actually, I prefer to think of my body as repurposed.

Remain calm, we need to talk. We don't want to alarm you. Run for your life! Oh boy. The economic news is not good. It's apocalyptic. We both lived through the depression. More like barely survived. We're seeing parallels -- lack of government investment, no-tax policies ... Fire, disease, bad cellphone coverage ... You're enjoying this too much. you said I could. Spend cautiously, Rudy. Have a back-up plan. Sell your gadgets, buy canned goods. Oh boy.

"It all seems a bit munch of a munchness."

"Embezzlement is now called virtual bank robbery."