Carriage Collector Gifts

A carriage driver interested in acquiring a different horse

Handbag store - "Perfect."

"We don't call them 'horns' anymore. They're interactive audio crash deterrent stimulators."

"In my life, I've had seven cars, six jobs, five houses, four bypass operations, and three wives!"

"I want to be straight with you, Cathy—I've gone through a number of cars in my life."

'It seats two comfortably.'

'God's speed.'

'You don't have the muscles to buy a muscle car, dear.'

"So, Bob... anything you'd like to tell me about your little trip to the hunting store on Boxing Day?"

'I'm afraid you'll have to buy a car, sir -- Braxton, here, accidentally sold your car to somebody else.'

'Now you know where you left your tools.'

'Mom, dad's toasting the new year with the car again!'

Utility Chic.

'Hi, I'm looking for something small and portable!'

'But, honey, the girl in the bikini only adds to the awesomeness of my car.'

"Most of my consumerism is self-taught."

Hague Convention Defied! Failure of the new Tommy-Scalder.

As you like it - One way of catching fish

Ecstatic caravan

"I like wine gadgets more than I like the wine!"

"There it is...the car of my dreams! It's the perfect match! The seat...the steering wheel...they just call my name! I'm not leaving here without it!"

"...and it comes with sat-nav, which as you can see the previous owner used all the time."

Acme Flyswatters.

'I meant bring your fishing tackle.'

'It has ten speeds but only one has been used.'

No Carrot Sign (like the old 'no radio' signs).

The evolution of a woman's purse.

Jazz Bagpipes

"Do you have anything smaller?"

"This isn't for me - it's for the economy."

'They say that these are also handy for carrying a sleeping bag, pad, tent, foul weather gear, extra clothes, trail mix...'

'Built in obsolescence: Mini with a wind up gramophone.'

Driverless tow truck.