Carnivore Dieters Pillows

'I'm not sure how to break this to you all... the Atkins diet is back.'

'Oh, and I suppose I'm the only one who's ever heard it's a 'dog eat dog world'?'

'We'll never be able to eat it all before it spoils -- how about a rabbit or something instead?'

"May I offer you a side of life insurance?"

'White meat or dark?'

A butcher and his apprentice.

Gazelle Pizza#:'You guys aren't interested in pizza are you?'

I Heart Dinosaurs Chef

"Man, what I wouldn't do for one of those free-range meals right now."

Cooked rare.

"Steak for breakfast, steak for lunch, steak for dinner. . . you can't stop evolution!"

'I dunno. Maybe we need a new slogan.'

Scientists Discover the Gene for Heterosexuality in Men

'I told you not to order the stake.'

"So who gets the rib eye and who gets the salad?"

Too rare perhaps?

Caveman restaurant: Oogs Pieces of cooked meet: Over one Dozen Served.

"Hurry, dear, it's the Brutal Gourmet."

'Oh ya! I didn't tell you guys. I'm a vegetarian now.'

"We're wolves, Jessica. We eat veal."

The food was nice...but something was missing.

We'll have whatever they are

'Not at all, Mr. Porker, we already have several pigs working in our company cafeteria.'

"Forget cholesterol. We eat meat, and that's that."

Dr Atkins on a date: 'Why does he keep looking at me like I'm a piece of meat?'

"The abattoir hasn't any butchers so you'll have to help yourself a bit more than usual."

"Sorry sir, it appears that we're out of chicken fingers."

'Eat my vegetables? - I thought we were supposed to be predators!'

"Check this out. If you pace back and forth, it hypnotizes them and they give you a steak."

'Eat my vegetables? - I thought we were supposed to be predators!'

'OK, it's a deal: I'll get you a Christmas Turkey if you get me a big Salmon...'

The good and bad news for the species is we have less fat than beef.

'First, wool. Then, lamb chops, Now they've got us creating antibiotics for them.'

'A person has to eat. Right, Judge?'

'No! Not rare, not medium, not well-done: I want my steak raw! Thank you...'