Caring Crusader Gifts

Batman at the Maternity Ward

Honey badger do care.

'Upon entering the rain forest...' 'Thousands of unknown species, and we can fool around with the genes of every one of them.'

"Be kind"

'Life is all attitude: 45 seconds of enjoying it...45,000 hours of regretting it...'

"Because when you go first nobody else has any fun, that's why."

'Before you come with me, tell me...does this robe look a little rumpled to you? I don't think the dry cleaners got the creases out, do you?'

Welcome to Mauritius Home of the Dodo Burger

"I'm in nonprofit work for the money."

Ironing day.

'There is no point in leaving civilization, because civilization will not leave you.'

Musical Accompaniment to Household Chores.

What the heck is wrong with people? These leftovers are perfectly good – and #5 plastics go in the recycling bin!

Your Guide to Winning Movember

'Boy, being an endangered species is quite hard: I get weighed, tagged, filmed, recorded and studied by scientists: I have no privacy...'

Water scarcity in Africa

Racial Profiling

"It would kill him to run a vacuum?"

Please Give

"Be afraid my friends...if the government takes over your healthcare, you're going to be left with nothing!"

"Wow, listen to that: "Do you have a pioneer spirit? Wolves needed for reintroduction into European National Parks"..."

Fumes from furniture

Suggestion box: 'Build a bigger Complaints box'.

Third World debt interest repayments/ charity aid

'So in summary, if you harpoon a whale enough it dies.'

"If you think this is bad, you should see what they do to themselves"

Trees on the form of a map of the world, being eaten by an infestation of pests that look uncannily like humans.

'It isn't supposed to taste good. It's furniture polish.'

Illustration on the problem of money that is given to charities ending up in the hands of governments.

And when did you first begin to feel threatened and endangered?

"I suggest you take an Empathy pill every day."

'When you've finished the washing up and you're certain you've cleaned absolutely everything... you'll always find another teaspoon.'

"I volunteer for the Samaritans. I tried to phone in sick this morning but they talked me out of it."

"I don't CARE if Tracy Emin's bed sold for £4440,000...I STILL want you to clean your room."

"You bet I'm stressed, I can't stop imagining there's a poacher hiding behind every bush..."