Career Humor Aficionado Gifts

"These are your basic career options."

"…and don't let your cash buyout, stock options and lifetime medical benefits hit you in the button the way out."

"Sorry, but your good references don't match the passion of your bad ones."

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

"And where have you previously moused?"

"Who gave you permission to ask for a raise?"

"The article you sent me on how technology causes stress crashed my computer."

'How would you feel about working in a small pond?'

'Recent studies in primate colonies suggest that organizational performance can be improved by replacing complicated financial incentives with bananas.'

"Here's some of my work for you to do. It should be a refreshing change...for me."

"You're hired. Now, I'll show you your desk, the break room, and the dented wall you're allowed to beat your head against."

"Here's to non-electric sharpeners."

"I can't decide who gets the promotion, so we'll settle it with a rope toy Tug O' War."

'Face it, we're never going to reach a consensus.'

Should not have put that suggestion in the suggestion box.'

'In the computer simulation he said he admired my candor and gave me a raise.'

"I was going to tell you it's a jungle out there, but I realize that's probably old news to you."

...The computer says you can handle 20 more work

Up-to-date Career-Specific Romance Novels

'She finally made employee of the month but she paid the ultimate price.'

"It's a shame, excellent recommendations and a superb skill set but lacks the boiling hot all consuming ambition and ruthless desire for self promotion required as head of stationary procurement."

'Remember you told me to be friendly to your boss.'

Batsford doesn't suffer fools gladly.

'You say you're willing to start at the bottom...'

'Remember, my door is always open Higgins, just be careful of the trap door.'

'It's not fair. Women doing the same job I'm doing in this office are being paid more than I am!'

'I've collected my memos into one reasonably priced gift book.'

"Confounded spell checker... never catches anything."

"So, Mr Canary, I see you have experience as a mine safety specialist..."

ANOTHER FINE MESS, INC.

'We're very proud of you, Jenkins. Keep up the good work.'

'Hawaii can wait. These reports cannot.'

'I owe you an apology, Greffman -- Let's keep it that way.'

"Next on the agenda: How can we crush workers' spirit, while appearing to care?"

We have a nice selection of office artifacts, a typewriter, carbon paper, ashtrays, our CEO's last handwritten memo...