Car Safety Professional Pillows

"Lose the seatbelt, Jason! You're embarrassing the entire family."

"And you're certain these are accidents?"

Unpopular Street Signs: Road Work Behind, Speed Jump Ahead, Good Luck, Slow Distracted Adults.

"They retired me. Just like that. Seems I'm no good over 55 mph anymore." "How does that make you feel?" "Like I want to bash my head against a wall!"

"Have you had a stressful experience lately, such as an accident?"

"Seriously Dad, it totally wasn't my fault."

'What the … ? How did those thugs get into my car?'

Knights Wing Mirrors.

"Slide, Howie!!! Slide!"

Nice park. . .

Last Road Rage Therapist for 500 Miles

"Nice job with the petunias, Skip. They're a perfect complement to the trip wires."

"I've seen this before. Keep his head inside the car when the vehicle is in motion."

'I don't like being a crash dummy either but there are some jobs humans won't do.'

"It helps prevent side collisions."

'I'm afraid we need someone with a little more backbone for this position.'

Alien crash test dummy emerges from downed UFO.

Big bumpers.

'Things are going from bad to worse in the auto industry.'

'See? If Mommy had been wearing her seatbelt that wouldn't have happened.'

"Oh, great, the warranty is up."

Piano Airbag

'I'm getting really tired of your friend crashing here every night!'

"I couldn't work out how to use my car seat-belt. . . and then it suddenly clicked!"

Crash Test Dummy Denied Insurance.

He suspected the driver's airbag was not functioning correctly.

'Oh, Sweetie, look, Daddy's fitting a new car seat for baby.'

"Any accidents within the last twelve months?"

"You're going on a very short journey."

'His airbag must have over inflated.'

Man with Air Bag,"Did you know the earth spins at 1038 mph?"