Car Rally Fan Gifts

GOAT PATH

Man has a picture of a rolls on his garage door...the car inside is very different.

Race track - with the race being to apply the white lines between lanes

My other car has a bumper sticker that says this on it too.

'This is a nice car Mr...did you have it from new?'

'It seats two comfortably.'

"Oh, oh, it seems they've had a little trouble with the hand-off in lane number three."

"If you think I ride too fast, Susan...just say so!"

'Geoffrey's kit car can go from nought to upside down in under nine seconds.'

The Unsportables: Relay

'I received your list of the type of company car you'd like to receive. The Maserati, Ferrari, Porche and Viper isn't possible, but there is a 1978 Pinto with your name written all over it.'

Formula One car origami

"Fill'er up with testosterone."

'Sure I said I love 'new car smell', but not as an aftershave.'

Pig Trotter

22. Being tireless is good trait to have in most jobs, but not when you're working on a pit crew.

Taking to the sky...

The Bagel Wheel Derby.

'Our limo's here.'

Daily News Headline Dept. Editor. Here's a story about a guy who shaved his race horse to cut wind resistance, and the horse got a terrible sunburn. "A pony shaved is a pony burned"!

'Since you lost your job you're really taking this 'taxi-driver for your kids' thing seriously, Dad.'

'I believe you were first.'

Campaign Trail

"He used to own a muscle car."

'Bob will be along shortly to marry you. He's looking over a mint-condition, 1965 Mustang that just went on sale.'

Racing pit crew member holds sign for driver: Stop And Ask For Directions.

The Race

'Soon I will have proved it ONCE AND FOR ALL!'

'I know you felt great after ten laps around the track, Mr. Fandella, but remember you were driving.'

Angry pensioner

Birds watching car race wishing they had wheels.

The Priceless Ming Vase Relays.

'I get 23 stations and a place to hang my coat!'

"I found your problem. This is a horse."

'And this is our basic model.'