Car Hijinks Gifts

'She think we're waiting out here in this sun? Hot-wire this sucker!'

"They retired me. Just like that. Seems I'm no good over 55 mph anymore." "How does that make you feel?" "Like I want to bash my head against a wall!"

Spiro & Pusho: watering the vine and the neighbour.

The Jerry Scarer

'I told Dad you painted his car!'

"I've seen this before. Keep his head inside the car when the vehicle is in motion."

To scare the pants off of kids who threw snowballs at his car, Ray outfitted it with exploding fake body panels.

Artists Impression of the first call for roadside assistance...

Solution to chuckholes...and have fun, too!

"Okay. Hit it."

'What can you give me for my liver?' 'A pound of onions!'

Horse steals a little girl's book.

"I can help you - I'm a para-legal."

'Power steering.'

"GPS wants me to stay put."

"Drat! A flat tyre. . ."

Piano Airbag

My doctor advised me to start walking more.

Crash Test Dummy Denied Insurance.

Josh tests his theory that by driving backward through a quick-pass toll lane, he can get money ADDED to his credit card account.

'...this x-ray shows that your husband took a surgical instrument fromt he operating room.'

Best Stunt Driver

"Of all the vehicles in heaven and you had to rear-end his car?"

Rally Judges

'… and another thing Mrs. Foley, that baby seat is not recommended for children beyond the pupa stage.'

Jester taunts the traffic police.

'WHOOOEEE! How's that for some fancy driving!?'

'What? -- you were picked up for reckless driving by the Coast Guard?'

for crying out loud officer its a wax mannequin

Two horned stags butt heads and airbags protect them.

Learner driver conned into being a getaway driver

Motorist sees three road signs: Bump, bump, badump.

'Blow into this, please sir.'

"Install it in the back seat, I'm used to getting my driving directions from there."

'Shall I call an ambulance or will you walk alongside?'