Car Fanatic T-Shirts

'Safety zone ends, resume driving like idiots.'

"I'd better change my habits/enjoy myself before it's too late!"

'What kind of a car wash is this place?'

'Yes, there has been a merger... but not the one I'd hoped for.'

'I'm not stealing your parking space...We're sharing.'

I'll have to get Dr. Kendrick to reduce his dosage of Prozac.

'Phyllis! Thank heaven! I was beginning to imagine something terrible had happened to the car!'

"My 'check gallbladder' light came on."

"She's driving"

"I'm afraid you have only six months to live, but your car should be good for another 30,000 miles."

Pump up a tire/Pump up a jam

"Having trouble stopping huh? Ah well, them's the brakes."

Talking car "Are we there yet?"

Cars at the drive in.

'I blame the sandwich I bought at Tesco. It probably had the wrong bio ethanol mix!'

'I've got third party insurance, but only been to two!'

"Do you mind if I smoke?"

Formula 1.

"Yeah, I was into the pet thing for a while, but that scene wasn't for me."

"I knew you were having an affair with your car!"

Digital Signalling System

'The mobile phone comes free.'

'Stop the car, Dan! Look, kids! Basketball!'

Car stickers: GONE FISHING,GONE BERSERK

"For the last time turn off that darn blinker."

'No you're not on a double yellow, you're on my foot.'

Driver test: Clown's big feet create challenge

Car on road, sees sign 'Road Plant Ahead' then comes across a plant on the road.

Son asks dad, 'Can I have a pet?' Dad answers, 'What sort?' Son says, 'A robot that eats cars!'

'Actually, it's the motor in my car. It's been missing for three weeks!'

'-and the look on his face when you overtook him in the Car Wash!'

Stop if the opportunity presents itself.

'She's a nice little runner, only one previous owner.'

'I'm getting pretty tired of all these potholes.'

It started with a giggling sound in the suspension, then a noise in the ventilator, and then...