Car Cleanliness Devotee Gifts

Nervous car wash owner sees huge flock of birds on his roof when he opens up for business.

Clown throws a bucket of confetti over car at 'Jimbo's carwash'.

"You're developing a nice, rich compost down here."

Car wash / Mouth wash

Man has applied car wax and sees the whole car melt in the sun.

"Washing your car will cause it to rain – science or superstition? We investigate on the next 'Cause and Effect.'"

'Right, moving on to the housekeeping...'

'We auto mechanics get no respect!'

"Our smart car sent a text saying it went to the car wash to get all the winter salt off it. Did it also have to say because I was too lazy to do it?"

'It's yet another customer survey asking about our last oil change. Was it poor, fair, very good, blissful or orgasmic?'

Wild Window Washers

'I always wash it before applying the turtle wax.'

'Why do you keep watering it, Dad? - It's not going to grow larger!'

'Remember, the best time to walk on it is just after they've washed it.'

'I'm so embarrassed driving such a filthy vehicle...'

"If the vineyard needs rain, why don't you get the truck washed?"

"I realize you like a clean floor, but I think one robotic vacuum should be enough."

'Don't bother rotating the tires. They rotated on their own all the way here.'

"With the deluxe package you get a vacuum, vanilla scented interior spray freshener, carnauba wax, and enlightenment."

"I told you! Seeing your reflection on a recently washed and polished car's roof is the best remedy for constipation."

Mouthwash.

'Hurry-up... I'm waiting!'

'Wait till she's dried it off completely -- it'll stick better that way.'

Man going through a car wash in a bath tub.

"This is what he would have wanted - he was a total neat freak."

'For $10.95 can I interest you in our deluxe wash and wax?'

"Welcome to 'Introductory Splatter Painting'."

"Your car won't be ready until it changes it's attitude."

'Remember, the best time to walk on it is just after they've washed it.'

Auto Repair. And how about some new wiper blades, Senator? I notice a lack of transparency.

"I'm at the dealership topping off my fluids while my car gets an oil change."

"I think we have the part. What model is it?"

Car wash.

'Why do you cats always have to leave tracks on my nice clean car?'

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