Car Care Fanatic Gifts

I'd also like the interior cleaned.

"Our smart car sent a text saying it went to the car wash to get all the winter salt off it. Did it also have to say because I was too lazy to do it?"

"Google car."

"These colder temperatures always cause my tire pressure to drop—it's a good thing I stopped to check." Peter finally grows up.

"Would you please step into the garage? Your car and I need to have a word with you."

Kid about scratched up car to dad: 'I made a mistake washing the car with a brillo pad.'

Roads with a view.

"We're having a little trouble with our hydraulic lift. I guess my question is, do you still want your muffler replaced?"

Car wash / Mouth wash

Man has applied car wax and sees the whole car melt in the sun.

'I don't think you can claim for this as a substitute car ...'

'We auto mechanics get no respect!'

Pump up a tire/Pump up a jam

'HA! Your last chance 86 miles back.'

Talking car "Are we there yet?"

A 1950's Barber Shop

"Actually he only asked for a buff-up."

"I'd like to give you a break, but we did have you doing a hundred and eighty-six thousand miles a second on the radar."

When did you last have your oil changed?

Cars at the drive in.

What's that? A car phone. All I need now is a car.

A dog drives a car while a man has two broken arms.

'And that's not all, everyone in the audience today is going home with a brand new Buick!!! Oh wait...That's next Tuesday.'

"Honest, Dad, somethin's wrong with the lawnmower." "You look fine to me. When you finish the lawn and pullin weeds feel free to wash the car and paint the house."

"Wow! This car has a continental kit, train horn, smoothed-out firewall, polyurethane bushings and a 2400-CFM fan! I have a long way to go!"

It started with a giggling sound in the suspension, then a noise in the ventilator, and then...

Driver test: Clown's big feet create challenge

'It's time for us to end this drought! You wash the cars and I'll go to the hairdresser.'

'Yes, there has been a merger... but not the one I'd hoped for.'

'I'm after a longer dipstick. This one doesn't reach the oil anymore.'

'It's yet another customer survey asking about our last oil change. Was it poor, fair, very good, blissful or orgasmic?'

Fred developed a hybrid-hybrid bio-diesel car.

"I'm done fixing your wheel, but these were left over when I got it put back together."

'Any chance of making this a 'catch and release', officer?'

'There are 12 in my family. Do you have anything smaller?'