Capital City Punster Gifts

Do you actually know the capital of Japan? Of course I do...J.

Cake Free Zone

Tree house.

'Will I live Doctor?' 'Yes, but I don't advise it!'

Dogs life

"I got ninety-nine problems, but a birch ain't one!"

'Iguana know what time it is.'

Kick Me! (sign on an anthropomorphized soccer ball)

Pet Cemetery.

Dog Walker

'I'm going to try that 'vegan' thing, Joe -- give me some beer nuts.'

'You can't reject my manuscript without due process!'

Note Book

"Igor, you fool! I said 'healthy brain'!"

"Only 150 kids? - Have you considered fertility treatment?"

'Tony can't come out to play now, he's on his orthodontopole!'

"Actually, There's a lot less pressure since I've gone from his best friend to his therapy dog."

A-Hem! I'm still singing here!

"No, I'm not a hare, I just happen to have big ears..."

"You are hereby sentenced to one year of swimming with the people."

"I'm not that kind of pro-Bono lawyer."

'I'll have a Martini, Jack. Extra dry.'

Licker Store

'Ah look, what a lovely tortoise shell cat.'

"Is that one of those brandy dogs?"

'If you want to improve your golf score, the best wood to use is a pencil with an eraser.'

'My mom says an apple a day keeps the physician's assistant away.'

Tiny man plays big cello, huge man plays tiny violin.

'That's Princess... formerly 'Prince'.'

'Hey, Lady, this is a sixty zone!'

"Your manuscript is utter trash, of course. How does a half-million first printing sound to you?"

'My broker swears it's a great investment but I fear it's just another pyramid scheme.'

'To save the state the expense of a trial, I thought I'd run off to Spain.'

Mobile Holmes.

Surfin' the web.