Canine Mystic Gifts

'...and where did you bury the bone?'

"You are going to have lots of puppies."

"Honey! A Jewish starfish!"

Vets: 'That's funny, he was here a minute ago.'

"Shhh - he's trying open his third nostril."

'He can't speak to the dead, but he can speak to the dead.'

'You know Solomon, I just keep feeling that something isn't quite right today.'

The grim reaper (of humans) and the angel of death (for dogs) are foreshadowing the imminent death of a man and his doh.

"She will take me on more walks."

'I've finished your horoscope, Bucky.'

'The oceans are vast, yet we never go anywhere!'

Identical twins, separated at birth. Both like to...chase cars, take naps, fetch sticks, bark, sit on furniture.

"You're not a goat person?"

"I thought Daryl Hannah was promised to King Neptune."

'And here's something for the dog.'

"Do not feel bad - violence is acceptable when the purpose of the toy is its own destruction."

Something happened to the cows...

'Animal magic.'

Telepekingesis.

Dog doing tricks on street corner.

".....Ear of dog, leg of toad, eye of ca...... Bloody hell, here comes Rolf Harris!"

No way am I sticking my paw in there!

Grimm's Fairytales - The Elfin-grove

The Holstein Prophecy.

'I never said you were a hypochonriac, I said your illness was a myth.'

'He's psychic, but only when it comes to can openers.'

"We'll start with the basics - Sit down and shut up."