Canine Coaches Pillows

'I was a good dog, but I never took the time to make myself a great dog.'

'Why is it he never understands sit , stay or down, but understands spayed and neutered?'

'So son - to make a long story short, if it moves, bark at it. . . and if it doesn't move, chew on it.'

"Good game."

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

I like the Jets...I guess

"Those aren't coconuts, they're tennis balls." "Sweet mother of Novak Djokovic!" The island of lost tennis balls.

'I'd say he's 10 percent 'pet' and 90 percent 'Lord and Master of All He Surveys'.'

'So far, I've taught him to fetch.'

"No no, I said sit!!"

Reach for the Star.

"Just another 50 decibels on your grunt and we can start to think about letting you hit a few balls!"

'I love your cardiovascular system!'

"Still, diving for it would look good on my college application.

"There will be a winning team and a losing team. Are you OK with that?"

'What distance! Pity it wasn't the hammer!'

'Sure beats your cupping your ear!'

Growl - Hiss Conflict Resolution Meeting

'These goalscoring celebrations are getting out of hand.'

"Good game, good game, nice game, namaste, good game, nice game ..."

Time Is Money

The trauma of losing.

Go! Means NOW!

"Moments like this make me glad I taught you how to fetch mojitos."

'Thou shalt not steal...except for bases.'

'As it's your first day we're going to start you on something easy.'

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a MAP, actually."

A married couple share the same pole vault.

Bears

'Pass it to Dewey! He's got himself into some kind of rhythm!!'

'Yes, Jenny, I know I'm always reminding the team to be good sports, but you really don't have to thank the ref after every call.'

Bringing Your Child To The Bicycle Race

"Um, Larry? That’s not a quail."

"Some advice please...How do I squeeze 9 days work into 5 and still see my family?"